Celebrating their differences

I always wanted two boys. When I tell people that, they look at me disbelievingly. But it's true. I told myself, though, that if my dream came true, I wouldn't compare them, no matter how similar or different they may be.


Yeah, that went out the window with the promise that they wouldn't watch tv or misbehave in public.


My boys are so, so different.


When L was 16 months, he looked more like a little boy. See?

He loved watching Diego and regularly put two to three words together. He had a huge vocabulary. Both his receptive and expressive language were strong, but his fine motor was and still is his weakness.


He threw major temper tantrums...screaming, hitting, kicking, often caused by his fierce independence and intense emotions. He wanted to do everything himself, but he did it carefully, and often in the most difficult way possible.


He was a big boy...wearing 2T clothes and he never ever walked... he ran, although he had really just started walking 3 and 1/2 months prior.


He didn't know a stranger...he would try to charm any woman he'd see, although he'd save the most flirtatious facial expressions for the prettiest girls. (Really.)


And oh, how he slept. He slept all night, every night. Basically, he was just like he is now.


And then, there's G. My sweet, sweet little baby. It's amazing to me how he seems to be so much younger than L at 16 months. First of all, he just looks younger.

He's tiny...most of the time, he's in 12 month clothes. He's shorter and weighs much less than L did at this age.

He's a man of few words, although his vocabulary has grown significantly lately and he now says mama, dada, Lo-Lo, Nana, PawPaw, eat, please, thank you, hot dog, up, down, all done, uh-oh, bye-bye, night-night, sock, hat, jacket, shoes, diaper, no, ball, apple, Batman, hi, bubble, dog, milk, banana, and signs many of them as well. He can point to his head, eyes, nose, ears, mouth, belly, and feet. He knows what a variety of animals say, including dog, frog, cow, bear, tiger, monkey, and elephant.

But he chooses to be quiet, usually. When we go out in public, he clings to me. He'll make eye contact with people, but he typically gives them a pouty, bashful face and takes a l-o-n-g time to warm up to anyone. When we go to a new place, he tends to get overstimulated easily.

He doesn't particularly like tv. He'll watch Bubble Guppies for a few minutes her and there, but he prefers to climb. That little monkey will climb on anything, even things that we don't think he has a chance of getting onto. His motor skills, both fine and gross, are clearly his strength. The kid is strong.

L was affectionate, but G makes him look downright standoffish. Everyone who knows G says that he is the most snuggly, cuddly baby. And part of me thinks that part of his sleep issues is due to his need for hugs and cuddles 24-7. For when I go in to his room and pick him up, he hugs me, hard, and falls right back asleep when I rock him.

I feel like I have the best of both worlds, and I am doubly blessed. It occurred to me today that not comparing isn't what the best momma would do. By understanding their differences, I understand them as individuals. So I'll compare my heart out, just like I swore I wouldn't. Then, I'll cut myself a little slack when they watch another episode of "Bubble" or throw a traffic-stopping tantrum at the grocery store.

To all of you mommas who compare your kids, or admit to doing all of those things you swore you never would...namaste.