Traditions

We are big on traditions on the holidays. Every 4th of July, we head to B's dad's house and tradition it up. BBQ, swimming, and fireworks in the court. I love me some black snakes and even though I have to push away the thoughts of how awful the smoke from them is for the environment and my lungs, I can't help but light 'em up one after another. Sitting on the end of the driveway with L and his cousins surrounding me is an Independence Day tradition. End of story, toxins and all.

Luckily, there are other parts of the day that I love, especially swimming in the neighbors' pool. This year, the neighbors were out of town, making for a less crowded pool. I wasn't the only one who enjoyed it wholeheartedly.

G and I finally got some swimming pool bonding time that we both enjoyed. Up until this point, G was tolerant of swimming at best, so I was thrilled to see him cheesing up the pool with his giant grin.


When little G's happy, Mama G's happy too.
Another tradition is finding a cute patriotic outfit for the boys and capturing them in fabulous photos.

Well, I wish it were. I mean, I got some great deals on a red, white, and blue ensemble for G. But truth be told, L insisted on wearing his somewhat faded red Superman tee, along with light blue shorts that I decided weren't worth the battle, considering after all, he was in the right colors. Kind of.

Things got crazy that evening anyway, so there are no photos of L's almost-patriotic threads anyway, and the only proof that G sported appropriate gear was this blurry photo stolen from B's phone.


That's what happens when you realize that holiday traditions are a bit more difficult with two babies, between cinders in eyes and poopy diapers and Who-Can-Be-The-Whiniest-During-The-Firework-Display contests. Those will lead Mommy to look for a beer, become disappointed by the options, and settle for a glass of cheap fruity quasi-wine.

Um.

Let's go back to the happy swimming phone pics, shall we?

L continued his fish status, to our delight. It was mostly delightful, anyway...until he jumped in the pool, forgetting that he had taken his life vest off, and no one was paying attention. I'm just now able to process this, and am beyond grateful that we've been doing swimming lessons since the summer after he turned one. Because that little man realized he didn't have his vest on, did an about-face, and got himself back to the edge. I said more than one prayer of thanks today. Because if you would have asked me before yesterday how something like that would have turned out, I wouldn't have wanted to even consider it.

He quickly put his vest back on, and hopped in the pool with his daddy.


Next year I'm ordering a party with less pool scares and more beer. Other than that, we'll continue the traditions.

Not Me! Monday: the 4th of July weekend edition

If you've been reading my blog for a while, you know that I am pretty much the perfect mom. I do NOT make any strange parenting decisions and I certainly do NOT make mistakes.

So it's safe to say that when we attended a birthday party on Saturday, I did NOT give L a few bites of meat that had cooked in barbecue sauce. Of course I know my son is allergic to tomatoes. And of course I know that barbecue sauce contains tomatoes. I do NOT make mistakes like that. Even if I did forget, I would NOT feel guilty when, for the next 36 hours, he got a rash, was very itchy, and was extremely hyperactive. Because, please, that would NOT happen to me.

Like I said, I am super sensitive to my son's allergies. So I would NOT ask my hubby to bring home a chocolate long john donut from the grocery store on Sunday morning. And if he did bring one home, I would NOT hide in my room and eat it since L couldn't have one. Of course I have adopted a very healthy lifestyle ever since his allergy diagnosis, and 8 months pregnant or not, I would NOT stray from it.

On Sunday afternoon, I would NOT allow my three-year-old to play guns with his older cousin. We all know I am a peace-waging hippie who would NOT allow gun play for my child. I certainly would NOT take a photo to document it:

Nope, NOT me! Guns are dangerous. For that matter, so are fireworks. So I would NOT allow my child to play with a sparkler. He's far too young for that and no matter how much he enjoyed it, I would NOT let him hold one. Or ten. Ahem.

I am NOT having major bladder control issues as of late. If I was, I certainly wouldn't post about it here. It has NOT gotten to the point that when I sneeze then curse, my husband laughs and says, "Pee your pants again?" I am far too classy for that. And even if that did happen, I would NOT talk to my husband's family, including his aunt and uncle about it yesterday. People would NOT be laughing at my snissing stories. Who does that?

Regardless of some stressful moments yesterday, I did NOT have a great time with my in-laws. This fourth of July was NOT the most fun to date, and I do NOT love seeing L grow up. NOT me!

I am sure you did NOT allow your children to do anything dangerous, like me...or Mckmama, who created this blog carnival. But if you want to be shocked by mothers who did, head on over to Mckmama's blog. Perhaps they are mothers like that over there...I am certainly NOT one of them!

Who loves Not Me! Mondays? NOT me!

Who, me? I did NOT take advantage of Logan's love of drumming and encourage him to "drum" on the always present knot in my left shoulder. I also did NOT teach him how to massage my feet when B was rubbing my feet for the first time in a long time this weekend! I did NOT say, "Squeeze Mommy's feet, L!" No way. And if he did, it would NOT feel good anyway. I would NOT ever use my son as a masseuse, even if it made him laugh hysterically. Not me.

At the 4th of July barbecue at my in-laws', B's dad did NOT say, "Well, it wouldn't be a holiday without seeing Gina's crack!" I did NOT laugh and tell him that I even wore boy shorts instead of a thong so my underwear wouldn't peek out. I would NOT ever let my thong hang out. That's just trashy. My underwear is NOT always an issue at B's dad's house. That would be weird. And even if I do adore my father-in-law and talk to him about just about everything, it is NOT funny to joke about your underwear with your in-laws.

I did NOT eat pizza, barbecue, blueberry pie, ice cream, tortilla chips, and a variety of other calorie-laden foods this weekend. In one weekend? Ew. I did NOT get up Sunday morning and make bacon, eggs and hash browns after all of that food. And I did NOT try some detoxifying yoga poses when I felt ridiculously sluggish. Because those do NOT work, and I'd never try them. Not me!

I was NOT nervous to go on a bike ride on our new mountain bikes with B and Lo last night. I was NOT afraid, because the last time I tried to ride a bike, I did NOT prove that you can, indeed, forget how to ride a bike. I was NOT in an abusive marriage then, and I am NOT still thinking about the power of self-confidence. I am NOT happy to report that I might have been a bit shaky, but I took off on my bike last night and had a blast with my boys!

I am NOT watching Denise Richards get her bra stuffed as she films a Funny or Die commercial selling her "funbags", in front of her dad, on her reality show. And if I ever did watch it, which I am NOT, I would NOT be laughing at it. Because everyone knows I am NOT one of those silly people who watches reality tv. I do NOT have The Real World progr ammed to record on my DVR. It's all so scripted and fake and brainless. Ugh.

Thanks to MckMama for creating the Not Me! Monday blog carnival! Head over to her blog to find out what everyone else did NOT do this week!

recovering from the 4th

I am currently recovering from a food hangover. Ugh. I've been eating healthy lately and went on a big ol' high-cal binge for about a day and a half. Note to self: Don't do that again. (Till the next holiday with all the delicious food.)

So rather than continuing to ramble nonsensically, I will just post a few pictures today of our 4th instead. I swear my child does smile. In fact, he giggles all the time. But the second the camera comes out, if I can get him to look, he stares at me like I have two heads.

We spent the day at B's dad and stepmom's house, as we do every 4th of July. There are lots of kids and tantrums and laughing and food and I look forward to the 4th every year.

My BIL, J, tried to get L to ride on the back of his little girl, A's tricycle. L just wanted to chill and make J carry him around on the bike, and J obliged. I found this hilarious.





L discovered a new-to-him toy at Paw Paw's house...a remote control dinosaur! It was the only time he stayed still for a few minutes!

I love sparklers but I do not love sparklers when a two year old wants to whip it around, apparently thinking your eye would be a fun place to put it. I ducked away from this sparkler about 82979 times. I did teach L the obligatory fun of spelling your name with a sparkler and he liked doing that..."Elllll, Ohhh, Jeeee, Ayyyyy, Ennnn."

Tailgating with Cousin A. A is exactly six weeks younger than Lo and about to become a big sister very soon. I am glad I let her mom enjoy her pregnancy alone this time. I am just now thinking I'm ready for a second. It could, however, be because A is a perfect princess. She's very timid and sweet (but I have to admit, I wouldn't change L's rambuctiousness and independence).

B was much less cautious with L and the sparklers...or maybe he just gave in to L's insistence, "I do it myself!"

B's brother J loves him some fireworks and takes great pride in putting the display on every year. It was cute watching him teach L the joy of champagne poppers (is that what they are called?). J doesn't have any kids and swears he never will, but he'd make a good daddy....

L is petrified of anything resembling a snake (and anything creepy crawly for that matter) but he was fascinated by my favorite...glow worms.

Hanging out with PawPaw watching the firework fountains...the way he was sitting cracked me up!

This next picture makes me laugh every time I look at it because Lo looks like he is trying to peek into the frame. Plus it is such a stereotypical family photo of us...we can never get anyone to smile at the same time! We were sitting in the back of my car because it had started to rain.
A cute shot of my boys...

L was awestruck by the fireworks. Too bad I don't know how to use photoshop...this would look a lot cooler if I could put an actual firework on the picture! :)

By the end of the night, we were all happily dirty and exhausted. L even said, "Lessgo bye-bye Mommy. I ready to go night-night."

Hope you all enjoyed your holiday as much as we did!